OP EN A LL N I G H T

Trying to find sleep
has kept me awake--funny
how these things work...
or don't.
I even tried to stop looking
thinking I'd outfox him; not
a chance.
I watched night after night
the furiously blinking
of colored neon
go off kilter & dance
the dance of St. Vitus.
And other times
I watched myself
and felt gut-punched
like seeing a Hopper painting.

I've believed misery & tragedy
will find you
no matter what you do.
Still, I've barricadded myself
in here for the past month
while that lustful virus
feasted on other hosts
less susceptible than I am.
I've got all the chronic conditions
that the little bugger could hope for.
Once inside, it would make short work of me.

You can learn
about yourself
at any age.
Recently, I'd boast
to all my doctors
& my few friends,
that I'd had a good life:
many scenes, many lovers,
many poems, high highs
& low lows--enough
to expect in this go round.
I was ready.
But now I feel the wisdom
of Auden in his, Musee Des Beaux Arts.
Old men cling passionately to life,
while unexpectedly the young go...
because I don't want to go
anywhere. I have more to read
& more to write. I want
another hot fudge sundae
and the smile of a woman
who sees something
I didn't think was showing.

And so I will watch
the little crack
underneath my door
or my windows
for any sign
of invasion.
I will not go easily;
I'll try to hide
behind the door
sneak up on it,
and knock that motherfucker
out.

Norman Savage
Greenwich Village, 2020

JESUS IS LOOKING

to being born
& I'm looking
for a whore
on Canal Street
so I won't die
in this godforsaken world
in an unforgiving town
on the outskirts
of mental illness
& "there's a medication
for that."

Heard they moved uptown,
an old alkie said
in front of the mission
on Lafayette. Ain't no action here,
except for old fucks
like us.

Where uptown? I inquired.

How the hell should I know?
Do I look like I'm mobile
with money and care
if I ever get a stiff dick again?

I needed a bowl
of wonton soup;
the wind
was picking up,
the temperature dropping,
and I was lost
in thought and
old remedies.

Norman Savage
Greenwich Village, 2017