SWEETENED BY LIES

memory fattens the spinal cord
where six plays with sixty
as if they were friends;
as if they could be anything more
than taunts down windy corridors
towards obsolescence.

It requires a backbone
dipped in brine
to make clean the letters
caught between teeth;
who knew the greed of infants
would swirl now around
a wizened & gristled mouth
with the stump of a sentence
caught in the throat
as I try to announce,
loudly, on the birth
of my ways.

It is here
in the cave
of cravings
where you hear
a nurse mention
cures, but this
is no time
to test theories.
You will have to do
whatever is available
for now, advancing
in the dark
toward desire. Hurt
is part of it, as is
the buzz of flies.
You do not smell
beginnings here,
only a charnel house
of a life
yet to be lived.

Norman Savage
Greenwich Village, 2020

ONCE THE TRAIN HAS LEFT THE STATION

you're fucked
or liberated,
sometimes both;
having little choice
but to ride that sonofabitch
'til the next stop.
But once your body calms
to that existential delemma
a voice
is able
to snake through
the clickity-clack,
the grinding metal-on-metal lullaby,
the hip-hoppers & be-boppers,
wails of the crazed or soon to be,
and it's your voice,
faint as it may be
it's just loud enough
to elbow its way
to the front of your forehead
making you deaf to all other sounds
save this
and it's a memory
once distant, perhaps,
but now pulling on your mind's tit
like it's the only tit in town.
And you realize
just how parched you were
for this memory
just this memory
sour or sweet
matters less
than nothing.
All you know
is thirst.

And so you ride. You ride
with your mother's accusations
and your father's back of his hand;
or you ride with their warmth
and sensitivities to your needs;
you ride with the girl you have
or want to have; you ride
with your failures or conquests:
that brtoken-bat hit bottom of the ninth,
or buzzer-beater; you ride
with a slip of your tongue and a look
on the face of someone who loves you,
who would sooner harm themself,
with incredulity at your brazen cruelty
and of not realizing who you are sooner...
and then
the train
slows,
levers are pulled,
brakes hiss,
air emits,
& the next station announced,
but it's not your station;
in your heart of hearts
you really have no station;
and almost allow a laugh,
but that would smack too much
of melodrama, a cheap perfume
for the untalented, but still
there is time, you think, and so
you allow yourself to be teased,
to be jostled toward the door,
flirting with fucking with your mind's disorder
at the border between stops
but don't make it, instead finding
yourself a seat.

Then, without warning,
just as your ass is about
to meet the plastic cradle,
it leaves you, this memory,
but not before a wisp of its color
nestles in your flesh.
And there it will wait,
but not for long,
for others to join
on this pilgrimage
to the next stop
& the stop after
& the one after
that. And maybe,
just maybe
at the end
they'll be a rainbow
of memories
instead of the usual
flood of cul-de-sacs
awaiting the next
train ride
to somewhere
to do something
with someone
you have no memory
of now or
ever.

Norman Savage
Greenwich Village, 2020

A COLLAGE OF GATHERING PERFECTIONS

Just rain,
at first--
not cars,
not trucks,
not sirens,
and not people--
just the rain
trying to get through
to me
outside my windows
on a slate-gray
Friday afternoon
piercing this hot/humid tedium
of July torture.
Monk is added
discovering new ways
to ponder old riddles.
I'm newly showered
& shampooed; I scrubed
my confines
protecting flesh & spirit
& now integrated
my morphine base
with cashews & raisins--
a treat for the sweet & salty
in all of us.
I lean back
& light a Lucky.
My body-molded desk chair
conforms to my bends.
A warm glow enters
with an opiate's forgiveness.
It seems I have a third eye
in the middle of my forehead
as Sonny joins Thelonious
& "I Want To Be Happy" plays--
yes, I want to be happy, too.
And I am happy
& what next
is now.

Norman Savage
Greenwich Village, 2020

THE OLD SHELL GAME

I try to hide
the black queen
of consciousness
underneath distractions.
And so I switch
from MSNBC
to TCM,
from Max Von Sydow
to Brian Williams,
from an expensive custom fit suit
and elegant striped tie,
to the fundemental garb of knights,
a sword of defense & conquest at his hip.
Both of these searchers,
both of these truth tellers,
are weary
from the battle,
the constant onslaught
of plagues & pandemics
begun & christened by
presidents & kings addled
with power & paranoia.

Philosophers seek death--
that is their job.
They are paid a pittance
for their efforts.
Brian & Max are entertainers
paid to inquire about death,
but distract us & our death
in the offing. They
are very well paid
for seeking out God's hand
in the sky's excrement
we slosh around in.
What truth can be found
in this chessgame of extirpation.

I press the Spectrum clicker:
Brian asks reporters how to make sense
of our president's lies, deceits,
and calloused disregard for lives
left to lurch in the dark
for a toilet that was there a minute ago;
Max is Swedish, cooler, just moving his knight.
Brian probes, though he knows the dialogue;
Max attacks...or hides in the rough;
Brian juggles opinions; Max alights with doubts;
Brian must adhere to corportate time;
Max submits to Bergman's script & directions.
If it seemed weightier back then
it's not because of passion, each
being masters of their craft, but
the difference between black & white & color;
for home has always held less safety
then the queen would have you believe.

Still, I could opt out--
turn on Seinfeld
or Columbo or
a hundred other electric narcotics
the tube offers, a mere click away.
But they, too, have a beginning,
middle & end; they too
provide an easy lie. I know
this will end one day
only because I will end one day.
Someone else will be drowning
in this swill. Probably,
the waters will be murkier,
the air more fetid; a bag
of potato chips will be lighter
but cost the same; toilet paper
will be fatter but cost more
than the food for waste did; meat
will be caged, all fish farmed;
each will be xeroxed copies of each;
fruits & vegetables lab produced
to only look like their pictures.
And the big questions will be
no bigger than the small ones
and every one will be sure
where the queen is
and once again
they will be
taken, fleeced
and coming back
for more.

Norman Savage
Greenwich Village, 2020

DOPE THAT'S BEEN STEPPED ON, AND STEPPED ON...

Let those silly romantics yearn
for days long ago
when beds held a virginal bliss
of a love yet to be unspooled
and unspoiled
by our all too human delusion
of a life in its earliest embryo
of innocence & safety.

America, too, the idea of,
has been cut, stepped on,
so many times,
you barely feel it, now,
except to feel cheated.
Once, pure, perhaps,
in the tents of chiefs
and those with lust
in their hearts
for adventure
carved trails over mountains
rock-ribbed from shore
to praire to shore
carrying banjos singing
with disbelief
and daring--
now reduced to a mathematics
naked of forests & rivers,
indulging earth's moods
whether scorched or flooded,
holding aces & eights
inside capillaries of sin,
tricked-out on Saturday nights
fucking any floppy breasted
sacrificial whore in sight.

Instead I'll choose to remember
going uptown to discover
dope so good
it was sold in fat
deuces & tray bags,
cut so honest
it bordered on religion
allowing me
to come down
from the cross
and up to sit in God's palm
amidst his opium breath
and golden spun dreams.

Norman Savage
Greenwich Village, 2020

INDEPENDENCE DAY, 2020

The pre-ejaculate of July 4th
sits sourly in America's stomach.
So many celebrations spurned;
so many festivities silenced;
so many B-B-Q's rotting meat
in the backyards of illusions.

The renegade mask
hides no Will Smiths
riding in, despite odds
or reason, to cure
& save us.

Our "We're # 1" finger
is stuck up our own ass,
cavorting with the end
products of yours
& this culture's
madness. While Tonto,
granite faced & wise,
stops riding shotgun
& moves off to a land
not yet discovered.

Norman Savage
Greenwich Village, 2020